


Unorthodox Methods

by Dreizehn



Category: Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Survivor 2
Genre: Crack, Gen, Humor, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-08
Updated: 2015-01-08
Packaged: 2018-03-06 15:20:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3139172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dreizehn/pseuds/Dreizehn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yamato runs out of options, so he resorts to desperate measures</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unorthodox Methods

**Author's Note:**

> Crack complete total crack don’t take this seriously please don’t, based around my second attempt at fighting Polaris

Yamato glanced down beside himself at the male lying on the ground barely hanging on to his consciousness and clicked his tongue. He then glanced up at the ‘women’ standing in front of him.

The fake Makoto. Fiercely glaring at him.

Yamato looked down at his phone. His demons were in near perfect condition but their magic was drained, rendering them both basically useless.

The fake Makoto threw a physical attack at him, but he paid it no mind as his Cerberus jumped in the way nullifying the attack. She then used a recarm and revived the fake Fumi.

"Futile. Cerberus." Yamato’s demon leaped at the fake Fumi and made quick work of her.

Something shifted beside him and Yamato noticed it was Hibiki. He somehow managed to sit up on his knees and clutched at his bleeding arm. “This has been going on for hours.” Hibiki complained.

"forty-five-minutes actually." Yamato corrected.

Hibiki glared at him then looked over at the fake Makoto and frowned. “Who cares. At this rate I’m gonna bleed to death by the time this is over.” Hibiki retorted. Yamato looked down at him and noticed he was bleeding quite a lot. His arm didn’t seem to be the only thing that was badly injured.

"Please do." Yamato said, then returned his Cerberus and replaced it with a Moloch then promptly cast a dia on himself. "Explain to me why there is only trash in the stock?" Yamato asked, trying to hold back the urge to put the boy out of his misery.

"Demons aren’t cheap!" Hibiki answered, causing one of Yamato’s eyes to twitch.

"Get them from the compendium!" Yamato responded.

"That’s even more pricey!" Hibiki retorted.

Yamato swiftly turned to face Hibiki and kicked him mid spin. He didn’t care if Hibiki was injured this was annoying him very fast.

Unfortunately, while he was distracted the Moloch was taken out. With an annoyed groan Yamato quickly called back his Cerberus. “This is pointless, we’re getting no where right now.”

"Try something physical?" Hibiki said, while trying to sit back up after getting kicked.

"Physical attacks are useless, she nullify’s them all." Yamato answered.

"So there’s nothing we can do?" Hibiki said, starting to lose hope.

"It seems- wait no…" Yamato then remembered something.

Something very far back in his memories, back to when he was but a small child, back when he still played with Alcor.

 

* * *

 

 

"Polaris? How would we beat that?" Little Yamato asked, pausing their game of chess.

"Hm maybe if you were to throw your phone at it, like you did that man earlier?" Alcor answered with a smile.

Yamato pouted. “That’s stupid.”

Alcor didn’t say anything in return only smiled knowingly at the child.

 

* * *

 

 

Yamato laughed. As a child he had brushed it off as Alcor simply playing with him, however now…

Yamato looked down at his phone closed it, took a step back, and threw it.

Hibiki’s eyes grew wide as he watched Yamato fling his phone at Polaris, but his mouth dropped when it made impact and a long crack appeared on Polaris.

"S-seriously?" Hibiki questioned, as he watched the area they were in return to a much brighter spot and the fakes that were left disappear. "We won?" Hibiki questioned not believing what he just witnessed.

Polaris started talking and said how he would grant their wish. Hibiki was left dumbfounded.

"That seriously worked?" Hibiki said looking at Yamato whom had went silent.

"It appears so…" Yamato said then turned to Hibiki. "I owe you something."

"Owe me?" Hibiki wondered, not sure what he could possibly owe him.

Yamato grinned. “Clinch your teeth!”

The last thing Hibiki did before the world reset, was suffer a punch straight to the face from Yamato.


End file.
